Welcome to the last Cairn of the year, the last little entrepreneurial trail marker that comes before the new year. As this year wraps up, I find myself wrestling with a few things. I owe these wrestlings to my boyfriend, who is constantly challenging me and keeping me accountable. Just as my dad would, he is challenging me to do the work, and do good work. Every challenge I have faced can be summed up in two words: comfort zone.
MARKETING
I placed an ad on Facebook for a month and got over 5,000 in reach, but zero bookings. That made me feel like crap. I’ve decided that maybe Facebook isn’t a good platform for advertising at this point in my business. Most of the photographers I see advertising on Facebook are targeting other creative professionals. While it was frustrating to watch my reach increase with no bookings, I learned something. Maybe I need my boots on the ground. Maybe I need to invest more in relationships and take some risks by connecting with other businesses. I can’t be so afraid of rejection that I fail to get new business. Maybe that will be a goal for the new year: connect with others instead of hiding behind computer screens and algorithms.
Its a rough life having to crawl out of this thing every morning. Especially with two cats taking me hostage.
DISCIPLINE
It’s really hard to be disciplined in working for yourself. I might seem super motivated, as though I get up ready to go every morning, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Sometimes I have that surge of motivation, but other days I might just want to sit on the couch, cuddle the cats and watch Parks and Rec for 9 hours. Most days are in between. Most days, I have to start planning my day in my head to give myself something to drive me. Not that I don’t love my job, but my bed is just really comfortable, and if I don’t have direction, it can be hard to get started. Snoozing is the best comfort zone of all.
Mental cocoon: Social media and blogging. And coffee.
FEAR
Three years into this and it still scares the crap out of me. There’s always that question in the back of my mind: what if the work dries up? What if I can’t make it? What if I get a bad reputation and then can’t even get a job? When I am faced with these questions, I find myself retreating into a nice little mental cocoon of safety. Ironically, that cocoon of safety is work. I focus on the safe parts of my job, the things I know how to do well, like blogging and social media. It’s true. The work will dry up sometimes, making it or not is under my control, as is my reputation. Facing fears like this means facing the realities of those questions. That’s the only way you get past the fears and put yourself in a place where you can plan for and deal with the things you’re afraid of. It really doesn’t make it any less scary, but it does open up a course of action.
…BUT IT’S STILL THE BEST JOB EVER.
It’s hard, it’s scary, and it’s worth it all. I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. I enjoy being my own boss, and I love the new ways my work ethic is developing. In addition, my aspirations are evolving as I’ve gotten into aviation. Being able to explore new avenues, such as aviation, for my business is a wonderful freedom. When you work for another company, you sign on to their vision. When you work for yourself, it’s your vision. It’s amazing being at the helm of your own company. All the struggles, all the fear, all the mundane tasks, they are all worth it.