SO BIG (and kind of old) NEWS! Glenn and I got engaged October 8, 2021.
I SAID YES! 10-08-21, Des Moines International Airport
Being engaged has been a whirlwind. In the process of planning and booking in even just the last month, I have learned so much about being a client. That means I’ve learned a few things about what it’s like to be YOU, my client. And I’m sorry for everything I didn’t get before. Here’s 5 things I didn’t understand.
PICKING OUT ENGAGEMENT SESSION OUTFITS.
This is a bitch. Maybe some of you are having an easy time with it because fashion is your jam or you’re just chill as hell about your wedding. If that’s you, cheers, and what’s your secret to chill? That ain’t me. I have a number of selections chosen on LL Beans website because my personal taste disagrees with current fashion trends. I worry about whether or not it will match with Glenn’s grey sweater. Everything goes with grey, dummy, I think to myself. I advise people on this all the time and I never grasped how tricky it can be. I’m sorry.
HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO BE A GOOD CLIENT.
I know this from a vendor’s standpoint. Nobody likes a client from hell. Maybe this one is unique to me, but it is extremely important to me that Glenn and I are good clients and give Kara and all of our other vendors a good experience with us. Not just because I’m in the wedding industry and my name could be attached to this, but because wedding vendors bust their asses to give you the wedding day of your dreams. I understand now why some clients are so great: they understand this and they genuinely care about the people serving them. Thank you, clients, for being so phenomenal. I hope I can live up to the standard you set.
Picking out clothes for an engagement session is a challenge. As much as I would love to, I don’t actually want to do my engagement photos in a hoodie and leggings.
SOME PLACES WON’T BOOK YOU TILL YOU HAVE YOUR VENUES SET.
This is super hard for couples who have non-traditional venues that they don’t own. Glenn and I are getting married at a small airport. It’s not a wedding venue at all. Some vendors won’t book us till we have those venues set in stone. The reason behind this is that vendors want to know that your date isn’t going to suddenly change after you’ve booked them and then they do not have your new date available. Another reason is many venues have preferred vendor lists. If you book your photographer and videographer, and then book, say, the World Food Prize Building and your photographer and videographer aren’t on their exclusive vendor list, you might have to find a new photographer/videographer or a new venue. If you book the venue first, your other vendors can tell you if they are allowed to work there, and they can have the peace of mind that you have already invested in your date.
HOW MUCH WORK A WEDDING WEBSITE IS.
I thought this would be easy. I started in September and I’m still not done. Now, I’m going the hard route and building on Squarespace because I’m a designer and therefore want every ounce of control over the design I can get. Even still, I didn’t consider all the things that typically go on a wedding website: your story, event information, wedding party, directions, and contact info. You can keep it simple and put all of this on one page.
Am I doing this? HELL NO. Because I’m a glutton for long projects.
I’m doing a main page with our story and our vendors, a page for the groomsmen, bridesmaids, flower girl and ring bearer, ushers and officiant, events from the engagement party to reception, a page with accommodations/points of interest in Ames, our registries, a contact page, and an RSVP page. Not to mention, as I do on this website, I’m doing all the photography for it, except for our engagement photos once they’re done. Having built a website I’m not terribly shocked at how much work it is (and now I’m thinking, would people like to read a blog?). I just didn’t know this much information went on a wedding page.
If you are my client, I will give you advice on your wedding website if you want it, for free.
On the left: A list of everything that needs to be completed on the website. Right: Shot list for all the photos that need to be taken. Doing a wedding website from scratch as I am doing is not an insignificant undertaking.
HOW MUCH PRESSURE COUPLES ARE UNDER (WITH A LOT OF CONFLICTING INFORMATION).
What’s an engagement party? Do I have to have one? How long should it last? Do I have to have all the things on my wedding website? Well, an engagement party is just a way to celebrate your engagement, or is it for the families to meet, which they should do before hand but also….. AAHHHHHHH. Every dang wedding advice page has a different answer. Youre already feeling the pressure of everyone having an opinion on your wedding, and now you’re trying to figure out what you want by learning about the different pre-wedding festivities, and you can’t even find a straight answer on that. My advice: it’s your wedding. Do what the fork you want for whatever reason you want. I’m sorry I didn’t realize how much insanity wedding planning is. Not everyone enjoys it like me. I’ll do better about checking in with my clients.
BONUS: HOW TO BE A CLIENT.
Wedding vendors, you hear me. Do you ever want to cater your own wedding, decorate your own wedding, photograph your own wedding, design your own attire? Because I definitely want to shoot my own wedding. Although I have gone over hundreds of possible ways to make it work, none have and my butthole brain still thinks it’s possible. It’s going to be so hard to snap out of photographer mode. I’ve been a vendor for so long that it might be painful to be a client. (Kara, I am so sorry.) If I ever take on a wedding vendor as a wedding client, I’m going to be so compassionate to this. As irritating as it might prove to be, I can say I don’t have the exact same instinct.
SO.
Dear clients,
I’m sorry I didn’t get it, and I’m sorry if I haven’t provided enough support. I will do my best to do better.
Emma, Emma Lee Creative